105%

Issue Ninety-Nine

by 105%-O-Matic March 10, 2009


Reading can be fun. Oh wait, that's water slides.

I don't know which fate is worse: No longer being able to wear those millennium New Years novelty glasses after 2010, or having eyes so deformed you can.
-Patrick Cassels
Bliss
If ignorance is bliss, why does the KKK always seem so angry?
-Dustin Davis
I feel like Cesar Millan is just a very specific version of The Beastmaster.
-Jenny Gustafson
It's ironic that I make instant oatmeal but then don't do crap for an hour.
-Linda Gresham
Koala bears
Do you know what koala bears do when the forest burns? They burn, too.
-Wojtek Bryniak
I just got my first tattoo and it really hurt. I think next time I'll use colder water to put it on.
-Max Spencer
True Love
My girlfriend said she couldn't live without me, which didn't make me feel that great. I think she would have said that to any guy performing CPR.
-Tyler Justice
I wrote a gospel hymn the other day. It was just the Charles in Charge theme song with "God" substituted for "Charles."
-AC 2Smart
Click here to submit your own 105%.
Likes 100   Recording...
Share this article
See more
105%-O-Matic

105%-O-Matic

View Profile
Send a message

RECENT ARTICLES

More
There are 136 comments. Signin or create an account to see them.
981 / 6,056

Recent Articles

NEWER    OLDER

Visit Our Partners

next previous
BFF
www.sportsgamer.com/

Check out the ultimate guide to sports gaming with tips, strategies, ratings and reviews to get the edge on the competition, and more importantly never lose to your stupid brother again.Go now!