Tim O'Donnell

The Student Who Cares Too Much About Others Being Late to Class

Man, this Econ class sure is difficult. It’s pretty annoying coming to class early every single time just to ask the professor questions about everything we’ve already gone over a few times. But it’ll be worth it when I get my A. Thank Godthe semester isalmost over. Wait a second, the door is opening. It’s that goddamn kid that always comes in 40 minutes late! Jesus Christ, there’s only 10 minutes left of class. Why would he come that late to class? He’s already missed pretty much the entire lecture. WTF?

Oh shit. I can’t believe he just did that. Instead of quietly grabbing the closest available seat to the door, he just completely walked in front of the professor while he was talking and he’s still walking. Oh no. he’s goingto sit in the seat next to mine. People might think I’m actually friends with this complete dirtball. Ok, stay calm… just look diagonally away from him towards the ceiling to show anyone that might be looking that I have no affiliation with this kid…ok, good, now scoff at him. How do you scoff? Just, like, exhale quickly and look away. Good, I think that worked.

Wow, this is ridiculous. He brought his laptop with him and he’s already on AIM. Unbelievable, he’s IMing at least 2 people right now. They just asked what he’s doing and he said “Nothing.” You’re damn right you’re doing nothing, brother. Nothing with your life!

And don’t tell me…yes, that IS a headphone. You’re listening to you ipod. You sir, disgust me. Your actions make a mockery of our system of higher- Is that Ben Folds? I love this song, oh man, it reminds me so much of last summer. Man, just let me lean in and listen for a sec- Oh fine, scoot away. Whatever, you late piece of crap.

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Search and Siezure

When I was 16, I was walking home one night from my girlfriend's (at the time) like any other night. Now, as a teen, I had a shaved head, but that's as far as it goes for me looking like "a bad ass". I was super straight edge. I got to the corner across the street from my apartment, and I was waiting patiently at the light to cross, when all of a sudden I hear the... Read More » wailers and see flashing lights coming in my direction. Two cops get out of their car, tell me to come over and proceed to start hassling me. Given where I lived (tantamount to gang territory) and the fact that I was a teen out past 11PM, this was annoying, but not a huge surprise. The first question they asked me was "where am I going?" I said home. They asked where home is, and I could point to my window from where I was standing. That wasn't good enough. They decided they were going to demand that I "empty my pockets on the hood of the car". I refused, at which point they accused me of having something to hide. But what they didn't know was that I was taking classes in Canadian law at my high school, and had already covered the section on statutes on search and seizure and probable cause. So I told them flat out: "Give me your badge number, and I'll empty my pockets. And, when you find nothing there, I'll be down at your station tomorrow with a lawyer and I won't leave until I have your job because I gave you no probable cause to stop me, let alone undergo a search and seizure of my personal belongings. And if you don't like it, fuck off". Needless to say, they got back in their car and told me to go home. And I did, smiling.