| Concept | American Interpretation | French Interpretation | Chinese Interpretation |
| Deodorant | Used daily to make the armpit smell fresh | N/A | Maximum efficiency is achieved by applying at a 22 degree angle, two swipes are sufficient |
| Wine | Comes in a sweet box with a nozzle. | Thousands upon thousands of different kinds, each one uniquely wonderful | Aftera glass, ones face becomes as red as an apple |
| Kung-Fu | Some Asian dish with noodles or something | Too violent. Would rather ride bicycles instead | An ancient art form which has beendeveloping for centuries |
| Toilet | Used for pooping | Water sprays up from them, cleansing the butthole | Erotic. |
| Game Shows | Chance to win up to one million dollars | Chance to win up to one million croissants | A man has to smash the buzzer with his penis before time runs out or electric eels will shock his eyeballs. |
| Water | Where’s the taste? This sucks. | Am I supposed to wash my body with this? | The essence of life |
| Hats | Ball caps, worn regular, backwards or sideways | Beret with a cottonball on top | Big cone looking deal |
| War | We’ll nuke your face off | Slingshots with cheese-cubes as ammo | Rich heritage of war dating back thousands of years |
| Cats | House-pet | Highly regarded, cats are much like the French themselves | Tastes great with dog tongue and a nice duck sauce |
| This Article | Not Funny | Fucking pointless | The Author has a small dick, much like we do. |
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