Uses For An Engineer's Scale, By Age

Ages 0-2: Drool holder

Ages 3-11: People hitter

Ages 12-14: Tech Deck grindrail, yeahh!!

Ages 15-16: Rubber-band powered pencil launcher

Ages 17-18: Penis measuring device…

Age 19: Loaf of tiny ninja stars: slice, and enjoy

Ages 20-21: Dried table puke scraper-offer

Ages 22-30: Device to measure distances on an engineering drawing, to better understand the object/location that drawing represents

Ages 31-40: That… thingy you used at your old job

Ages 41-69: Viagra effectiveness gauge. Sigh…

Ages 70+: What is that thing? Can’t even read the dern markings… ugh… will it get me laid?