My friend Jim (www.collegehumor.com/user:752178) is finally getting his Associate's Degree after attending Community College on and off for the past eight and a half years. In a tribute to him, I've decided to list a bunch of other things a person could do in the time it took him to get his two year-degree:

• Get a Bachelor's Degree, get another Bachelor's Degree, begin work on third Bachelor's Degree.
• Attend four years of high school, four years of college, and start a career
• Celebrate your tenth birthday through your seventeenth birthday
  
  
• Grow from a first grader into an eighth grader
• Get drafted for a professional sports team out of college and play for eight seasons
  
  
• Not be old enough to see a movie rated PG-13 and then be old enough to see a movie rated R
• Go from liking Nickelodeon to MTV to VH1
• Write a paper on the night George W. Bush gives the State of the Union address – for eight straight years
  
  
• Have a Geocities page, a Xanga page, a Facebook page, and a MySpace page
• Give a speech at your middle school graduation and at your high school graduation.
• Have your first drink, your first girlfriend, your first sexual experience, and your first child