If Lindsay Lohan Put on a Few

In a recent interview, Lindsay Lohan admitted to suffering from Bulimia and Anorexia, and in doing so has become the poster child for young, rich, skinny, biatches. It’s my humble opinion that it might do her some good to gain a little weight. But how much? And at what cost?

If Lindsay Lohan gained 5 pounds she would finally qualify for the “Save a starving child” foundation. As it stands she is in the category “Lost cause; cannot be saved”

If she gained 10 pounds she would no longer be able to slip out of standard issue handcuffs.

If she gained 15 pounds you’s not be able to play her ribcage like a xylophone.

With an extra 20 pounds she’d finally break the century mark. 100 pounds, Lindsay. I knew you could do it. You go girl!

If she gained 30 pounds her tits, ass, and love handles would all benefit nicely. Let’s just say Playboy would set up shop outside her house until she agreeed to do a 12 page spread of her in a candyshop.

If she gained 40 pounds, she’d hit the average weight for a girl her height.

If she gained 50 pounds she’d still be hotter than Ashley Simpson (both Ashley and blond Ashley 2.0)

If she gained 100 pounds her VH1 “Behind the Scenes” could have a segment about how getting fat makes you lose your fame and fortune in unforgiving Hollywood.

And finally, if Lindsay Lohan were to gain 250 pounds, I might be able to make out with her at a bar.