As I watched the football game on Saturday night, some thoughts swirled around in my head. Thoughts I felt ought to be shared with the public.

Jeff Samardzija still needs a haircut

Shouting "False start!" when flags go flying and whistles are blown before the snap doesn't make you a football genius. You sound like a jackass. And an even bigger one if the call is encroachment.

Charlie Weiss should change his first name to Chuck, seeing as he undoubtedly eats a whole lot of ground chuck.

There are very few, if any, unattractive USC students.

The same cannot be said for ND students, however.

John David Booty may have one of the coolest names in college football, second only to Colt McCoy.

Conversely, Brady Quinn may have one of the girliest names in college football, second only to Rainbow McMiniskirt.

I could have totally made the same catch as Dwayne Jarrett. I just choose not to.

Singing the "Notre Dame Victory March" at a bar when your team is down 21-10 not only makes you a loser, but a pathetic loser.

It's a good thing Notre Dame's fans are Irish, as they are well-suited to drink their sorrows away.