Some random thoughts that drifted through my head when I flew back to school:

This kid next to me better not look over at my computer for a little while. That nude scene from Wedding Crashers is coming up and I don't want to have to minimize the screen

John Denver was in fact not full of shit; the Rockies are pretty damn rocky

I would definitely do brunette stewardess; it would take me about five beers for the blonde one

But seriously: what is the deal with airplane food?

What the hell song did I just listen to as I was dozing off?

Oh shit, is it in bad taste to mention John Denver in an article about airplanes?

If this plane goes down, that chick two rows ahead would probably be my best bet for sex

Plots of farmland are really square-shaped.

I hope no one heard that fart

I could totally parachute safely down to the ground from up here

Upon second thought, John Denver's passing was a while ago. And I couldn't do much worse than South Park