10. Come up with an elaborate lie on why you won't be able to write your finals. Remember, the more far-fetched it is, the more believable. For example, "Dear [insert your professor's name], I, [insert your name], will not be able to attend your final examination because I was hit by a nuclear missile while masturbating in a tree. I also found out I have ball cancer. Happy Holidays!" FYI, this is mine.
9. Play some Mario Kart. MARIO KART RULES!!
8. Make friends with a Chinese man.
7. Pick up a hooker to have sex with. Then, when she is sleeping, take a dump on her chest. Uhh, I mean read a book.
6. Invent a device that will stop time. By doing so, you will have all the time in the world to study. That, or to undress every female within a 10 km radius.
5. Pick a fight with a homeless man. If he is too lazy to fight, fart on his leg.
4. Cry in the shower.
3. Write a revision of "Everybody Poops." In this revision, include a chapter on why it is okay for a man to poop on a woman's chest, if they really love each other.
2. Alphabetize your 'NSYNC albums. What? You don't listen to 'NSYNC? Me neither, I swear.
1. Make a list of 10 things to do instead of studying for your finals.