Ok little man… right now, you think this is just about your super-fun summer camp experience, but this selection could make or break your entire life.

Ohh, yes that soccer camp brochure is pretty cool. OK… maybe soccer isn’t the coolest sport out there, but its still a sport right??? I mean… look at David Beckham… chicks dig that guy.

What… what do you have there mini me??? Space camp??? Oh man… no.. put that thing down, nobody likes the kid that goes to space camp. Space camp is the first step in the 2 step process of becoming a life-long virgin. Step 2 is living in your "command centre" in your parents basement for the rest of your life.

Sick… Look at that, football camp. now there’s a camp that will pay real dividends. First I will be a high school football star, then in College, I can tell all the chicks that come to my frat parties that I was a high school football star, while flexing my biceps in my way-too-tight vintage cut polo shirt (visor optional). That would be totally boss.

Magic camp?? the only thing magic about magic camp is that in the future you will be able to make all the girls disappear. So gay man. But seriously… I guess Harry Potter is pretty boss… and chicks love guys with money, especially when they can pull it from behind their ear, that’s basically a guarantee to get laid, especially if you let them keep the quarter. Yeah that’s right fill out that registration form. Magic camp here I come… this is gonna get me laid for sure. I mean, what chick doesn’t wanna fuck David Blaine… right???

Right??? fuck.