7 Things you ought to do

1. Get a friend to sign an agreement that he will bail you out of jail if need be.

2. Buy Ephedrine syringes.

3. Draw a target in the parking lot behind your balcony so people have something to aim their puke at.

4. Never stand near the target.

5. Streak nudist colonies in a tuxedo.

6. Say a blessing before meals. Everyone will close their eyes and you can look at cleavages unobserved.

7. Own a Yak-Bak. What a useful invention!