Things I learned from my study abroad in France

- Paris is not full of “Rage” Zombies as 28 Weeks Later would have me believe. The customs officer at the airport wasn’t very friendly after I tried to bring a hand gun on the plane for protection.

- If you hear a shitty American song at a bar in , you instantly become very proud of it and feel it represents your entire culture.

- French waiters are rude as fuck when you scream at them in English about how expensive the food is.

- The closest thing to a 4 of July celebration you can come across in is running into a group of other Americans at a bus stop around 3:00am and screaming a drunken rendition of the Star Spangled Banner.

- In a country where bottles of wine can cost less than 3 american dollars, the corkscrew is the new bottle opener.

- “I am American” in any language isn’t exactly an excuse for being ignorant and obnoxious, but the locals will accept your faults better if you say it.

- The goal of any European guy at a club or bar is to fuck any American girls he lays his eyes on. So they aren’t much different from us after all.