Hell Week at Gamma Alpha Upsilon
Brother: I said, 'Open your mouth, Pledge'.
Pledge: It's just that
well, this seems a little
you know?
Brother: What? What does it seem like? A sacred oath?
Pledge: No, not a sacred oath. It feels a little
Brother: Awesome? Holy?
Pledge: No, gay. It seems pretty gay.
Brother: Gay?!?
Pledge: Yeah, gay. I mean, do I really need to put your thing in my mouth?
Brother: Yes. Yes you do.
Pledge: And that doesn't seem gay to you at all?
Brother: No, it seems like trust to me.
Pledge: Trust?
Brother: Yes, trust. I'm trusting you not to bite me in my most vulnerable place.
Pledge: Fine, I get that. But still, it's gay.
Brother: No, it's not. Was it gay when you did the "Walk of Trust" with the other pledges?
Pledge: You mean when we held each other's penises and walked around in a circle saying 'You are my brother, I love you'??
Brother: Of course! What other "Walk of Trust" has there been?
Pledge: Yeah, that was kind of gay.
Brother: And the "Paddle of Brotherhood"?
Pledge: Yup. Pretty gay there too.
Brother: I'm starting to question your loyalty to Gamma Alpha Upsilon
Pledge: Me too.
Brother: All of these exercises are to promote Brotherhood and Loyalty. The pillars of what our fraternity were founded on.
Pledge: Yeah, but what part of sodomizing us Pledges with candlesticks equalled Loyalty?
Brother: Trust me, it works. Has any Brother ever given up the secrets of the fraternity?
Pledge: But seriously, it's a little gay.
Brother: Think of all the chicks you'll get. A Gamma Alpha Upsilon guy never sweats the V. Now, just open your mouth. It'll only take a second.
Pledge: Fine, if it wasn't for all the chicks, this would be soooo gay.
Brother: Shhh
Shhh
Shhh
Just let it happen.
More By
Mr Kreeg
Comments ( )

How to Get Any Guy to Sleep with You
Simplified Debates.
Jersey Fight Club
Your 12 Weirdly Specific New Favorite Things (According to Buzzfeed)
It's So Big! The Spider, I Mean
#PostYourBestBobDeNiroFace
12 Man of Steel Pickup Lines
Almost Reading
The Troll
Humor Us
TLDNR
Regret Everything
The Graphic Truth
CollegeHumor Interview
Twidiots