by Max Lance, TheTripe.com
Asked a stroke victim if it was a back or butterfly.
Read July horoscopes to people in the cancer ward.
Turned on all surge protectors for the woman who needed a surgeon.
Casually walked around the man who needed a bypass.
Took rhinoplasty and elephantitis patients to the zoo.
Sent cops after Brett "The Hitman" Hart after a report of a heart attack.
Made a decree against coup-de-tats after someone reported a seizure.
Put up a "No politician assistants" sign to stop diagnosis of AIDS.
Invaded East Timor after finding a lump on a woman's right breast.