Conversations with a Guy Who Just Doesn't Get It

Guy Who Just Doesn’t Get It: Oh, hey! What are you up to?
Hot Chick: Oh, you know, nothing much. I just have two hours to kill until my next class.
GWJDGI: Wow, that’s weird. Me too!
HC: I don’t know what I’m going to do for all that time…
GWJDGI: Well, good luck finding something. (Walks away whistling)

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Girl: I had fun tonight.
GWJDGI: Yeah, me too.
Girl: A lot of fun…
GWJDGI: I wish the night didn’t have to end.
Girl: Maybe it doesn’t… (Winks)
GWJDGI: Yeah, well, I mean, this is the door to your apartment. How much further could it go? (laughs)
Girl: Um… do… do you wanna come in for coffee?
GWJDGI: Oh, um… well… It’s like midnight. If I have coffee now I won’t sleep all night.
Girl: Maybe we could find something to do besides sleep. (coy look)
GWJDGI: Probably not. I mean, it’s night time. That’s when people sleep.
Girl: Oh…I meant…
GWJDGI: Lates! (Walks away whistling)

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Girl: Night, sugar.
GWJDGI: That sounds like a metal band. (Screechy metal voice) GRANDMOTHER WHAT WAS IT LIIIIIIIIKE???
Girl: Does it still sound like that if it’s whispered breathily into your ear?
GWJDGI: No.
Girl: Good.
GWJDGI: That would probably sound gay. (Walks away whistling)