What my Internet is thinking

Facebook, that’s cool- gotta see whats happening with the buddies.
CNN… cool cool…
Bangbros? Again. They haven’t even updated.
Fantasy football… yes you lost again, that’s what happens when you pick Defense in the first round dipshit.
Wikipedia… here we go now. Oh only looking at one thing? “Flower Tucci” … hmm where have I heard that… oh wait, there you go back to Bangbros. I think you have an addiction. Now what? Downloading a torrent for her DVDs? Fucking great. As if the hard drive isn’t already full of porn.

Time to start doing some homework maybe? For the Supreme Court class… here, I’ll just crash so you can focus a bit more.

Okay back… how about we go to the class website to review… fuck. You want to go to Facebook. Again. That cute girl from Chemistry is not going to fuck you if you keep stalking her like this.
3 minutes and no mouse click? I hate when you jerk off randomly like that.

Right, back to class. Why not go to the Supreme Court website and… fuck. Bangbros again? What’s wrong with you? You’re downloading about 3 gigs of porn as we speak (slowing me down, by the way).

Now you’re going on AIM? I fucking hate that. Yeah talk to that chick from high school you tell your new college buddies you “totally fucked”… now you’re Googling her name in quotes next to your hometown… not stalker status at all.

Oh youtube, that’s always fun for me. Yes, a dramatic chipmunk. Now he’s wearing a hat. How many times can you think this is funny, gaywad? Now you’re sharing it on Facebook. I fucking hate Facebook- why don’t you just set it as your fucking homepage?


Hey look, your giant porn DVD collection is done. And you got zero studying done. Revolutionized the world, my ass.