The Citizen Kane of recurring CollegeHumor columns.
I was waiting for the elevator the other day when I realized I forgot my phone on my desk. Just as I turned to get my phone, the door opened and there was a chink inside. I said, “I’ll get the next one,” and walked away. I must have looked like a total racist!”
Prayers are like the Christian rock of poetry.
“Last night I was so drunk, I cooked and ate fried green tomatoes.”
“Haha like you ate the movie?”
“No, man.”
“Oh. So how’d it taste?”
“I dunno. It tasted like any book.”
“Haha like you ate the movie?”
“No, man.”
“Oh. So how’d it taste?”
“I dunno. It tasted like any book.”
I like my women like I like my coffee, not wearing a shirt.
Dating Dos and Don'ts
News Feed History of the World: January 2012
Every Time a Bell Rings
How Creepy You Are, as Determined by Your Pets
The 8 Relatives You'll Talk to at Thanksgiving
Drinking Games for the Mature Adult
Spending your Valentine's Day on the internet? This will make everything better.
Thoughts on Valentine's Day from people who are paid to be cynical bastards.
The 3D makes this movie look real...ly sucky
Your pet says a lot about you. But then, you have a gossipy parrot.
Guys try to surf without water, and somehow succeed.
Ice T is good, but this time of year it's all about CoCo
Yeah! And why did Microsoft make Bing when they can just use Google?
Valentine's Day was simpler back then. And creepier.
Hey! Get your real world out of my internet!
These guys are getting called out by the reeferee.
