The Story of Adam and Miriam

Adam and Miriam walked through the woods near Percy Priest Lake. Adam said to Miriam, “You are a woman. I have been told for all my life that women are inferior to men in all aspects and, being a simpleton, have believed it; for the people who have said so are authority figures.”
Miriam, a much wiser individual than her polo shirt-wearing counterpart, responded: “You’re an idiot. It is not only wrong, but sexist to believe such without truly thinking through the matter and seeing that the only difference is that women understand men to be simple-minded and easily bent to our wills. Thus, men are inferior to women.”
Adam laughed. “It is not so! God loves us more, I can guarantee it!”
Hearing his name being invoked, God appeared in the form of a blue pyramid with an eye in the center. “Why do you bicker?” God asked.
“Adam is a fool,” said Miriam. “He believes without reasoning for himself.”
“Miriam is a fool,” said Adam. “She has a gigantic ego.”
God, being very wise, thought for a moment. “I shall test you two. Your answers shall determine the answer to this debate that has plagued humanity for centuries. This is a simple question, yet it tests all aspects that are valued both in heaven and earth.
“Can I, being the Lord, infinitely powerful, created a rock so large that even I cannot lift it?”
The two humans looked at each other for a minute and then lapsed into silent thought. The hours swung by. The sun moved across the sky. As night approached and night creatures began to stir, the two finally arose from their meditations. “I have an answer,” said Adam.
“As do I,” said Miriam.
“Well it’s about time,” said God. “I’m here as a pyramid. Do you have any idea how bored I’ve been, sitting here for six hours? Adam, since I feel that alphabetical order is a fine way to proceed, you may go first.”
“The question requires use of both reason and faith. Were you to create a rock that you cannot lift, then that would mean that you are not infinitely strong. Thus, you cannot create a rock you cannot lift.”
God nodded. “Miriam?”
“The question defeats itself. Thus, there is no answer.”
God considered the two responses. “I have come to a conclusion. Doubtless, you will both be horribly disappointed by my answer, but that is the way of things. Adam, your answer shows two things: First, you do indeed place too much emphasis on faith instead of reason. Second, by saying that I cannot create something, you, sir, are calling my powers a fluke.” Adam began to speak, but the Lord silenced him by expelling a blue brick at his face at great speeds. “Miriam, your answer is a cop-out, but a wise cop-out, nonetheless.
“My decision is this: Both of you have a lot of work to do on yourselves until you can even begin insulting each other. Adam,” said the Lord, “you’ve really cheesed me off. I shall punish you. Your form shall be diminished to a yellow semi-stick figure. You shall be stuck in a running position, mid-stride, from which you will never be able to move. Your legs will cramp, your arms will stiffen, and your spine will begin to ache. As if this were not enough, I shall force you to constantly push a representation of me in my current form- a blue triangle. You shall be the icon of a program. For all eternity, this shall be your figure.”
Adam wept for two seconds until his form changed.
And that is where the AIM dude comes from.