Morning After Grey's Anatomy: A Change is Gonna Come (Season 4, Episode 1)

I’ll admit: Grey’s Anatomy has seen its hey-day. The show peaked at the end of the second season, has been on a slow decline since, experienced the backlash of a major public scandal, and has seen two major characters leave. But I keep watching, mostly because it’s like witnessing a car wreck which is—Hey! Good segue!—exactly what happened in last night’s season 4 opener.

Let ‘s just get started: The interns spend their first day as residents by generally acting clueless, irritating one another, and breaking up for no reason. I’ll get to all of that later, but let’s first address how Izzie has totally lost it. Last season she told George she’s in love with him, which is pretty puzzling, because didn’t she spend the entirety of last season acting depressed about Denny? And then one day she just fell in love with George and on her way down drunkenly landed on his penis. It’s completely baffling. One more reason this doesn’t make sense: Izzie is a severe hottie. George is handsome and wonderful and so sweet, but in real life, girls who look like Izzie date Tom Brady, not skittish little fidgets like George.

Anyway, Izzie saves that deer in the parking lot with her interns because she has nothing better to do. Um, a major car crash just happened. There’s really nothing else to do than talk about the Circle of Life in the bed of a pickup truck? And the little boy cries, sympathy is evoked, and it’s all sort of nice, until I realized that I live in Ohio, where deer multiply like roaches and exist to total cars. The dad of the little boy (who I will refer to as “Father of the Year”) knows this too and remarks to his son, “You don’t save them, you eat them.” That is awesome. If the Seattle Grace emergency room adopted that policy I would like this show so much better.

Meanwhile, George starts his first day over as an intern, delivers a baby, and mostly whines like a little bitch. Still though, he’s the most likable character on the show, because everyone else is so nuts. Look at Callie! Callie’s holding onto her dead marriage and trying desperately to get pregnant and is so totally in denial about what is happening to her personal life that she lashes out at the people aroundher. She reminds me of this girl who came up to me last year at a party and said, “Wow. What’s your name? You know that guy you were talking to? He’s my boyfriend. Don’t touch him. You seem like a really nice girl and I don’t want to have to claw your eyes out with my nails.” And then the girl walked away. That is Callie when she gets all territorial: she is crazy girl with the scary fuchsia talons.

Everything else is pretty much on track. Bailey acts embittered and irritable. Christina acts embittered and irritable. Meredith acts broken and flawed and looks like Ally McBeal escaped from Bergen-Belsen. Seriously, girl. Eat a sandwich. McDreamy cut off all his hair, effectively castrating the whole series. There was some gross stuff with blood. Meredith’s long-lost half-sister Lexy is a new character and I’m sure will cause passive-aggressive drama for the rest of the season. Oh, and this fun little exchange of dialogue occurred concerning Burke’s absence:
Christina: Where is Burke? Is he off today?
McDreamy: No… he’s gone.
And that was pretty much it. No real explanation. Hasn’t Christina picked up a copy of US Weekly in the past year? He’s gone because he’s a homophobe. God, Christina, you’re so stupid. Still, I hope the producers find a way to account for Burke’s departure better than “He’s gone,” because I loved Preston Burke and I need to mourn him.

The episode doesn’t really pick up until the last two minutes, when Derek and Meredith break up for basically no reason and then bang. This is another reason Grey’s Anatomy is totally divorced from reality: Meredith Grey is like 29 and needy and has a ton of father issues and I’m pretty sure could sneeze and die because she’s so emaciated. McDreamy is a hot brain surgeon who is in love with her. Real smart, Meredith. I’m sure this is just one way for the producers to squeeze a plot line out of what otherwise promises to be a dismal season.

Oh, and George shows up at Izzie’s late at night in the last minute of the episode to tell her he loves her. Yeah, like no one saw that coming.

Final thoughts:
Alex’s goatee/hair combo make him look like one of those minstrels at the Renaissance Fair.
Line of the night: “Check it out, it’s a Buffalo Nickel!” -Alex after pulling change out of PICA guy
Next episode looks promising: The Chief screams, “A resident has been attacked and A BABY IS MISSING!” Now there’s the Grey’s I know and love.