Ugh... Old People.

My grandparents, both sets of them, are exceptions, anomalies even. They are wonderful, intelligent, polite, witty people that are a joy to be around, which places them in complete juxtaposition to the rest of the old bags draining my social security. Oh yeah, my grandparents actually have jobs still so they aren’t suckling off the government tit just yet. At least once that time comes they will have rightly earned it. It’s the govenrment’s fault that social security won’t be there when I’m 60, but I digress.
I hate 99 percent of the rest of the adult-diaper wearing populace. They have a sense of self-entitlement that disgusts me, everything they do is in slowmotion( and yes, , there is such a thing as too much slowmo), they simply don’t comprehend anything that has occured since 1983, and they drive like, well, like old people fuck.
There should be mandatory driving tests, both written and driving, that senior citizens should be required to take each year after they turn 60. I’m sure everyone can see the benefit of having mandatory tests for the elderly, so I’ll skip that part, but I’m sure the question apparent is “Why every year?”. I’ll tell you why, Doubting Thomas. Old people’s minds are a very fragile thing, prone to error and errosion in an instant. How many times do you see geriatrics with their clothes on wrong or forgetting shit they said 5 minutes ago? All the fucking time. A mind is like a ticking time bomb just waiting to go all to shit at the last second. Once you reach 50, that last second hangs ominously over your head like a ton of bricks. Therefore, make all old folks take a test once a year to prove they can operate a 2 ton vehicle capable of mass destruction.
I’ll finish with a true story. A month ago I went with my fiance to get her vehicle fixed. While at the Ford place I saw a sweet elderly couple in the waiting room with two middle age people who were there acting as caretakers. The old people couldn’t understand what was going on with their vehicle or that the bill needed to be paid, so the caretakers, uhh, took care of things for them. Upon paying the bill the caretakers, one for each old person, got behind them like marionets and puppet-walked them out to their car. The oldfolks proceeded to stall traffic as they pulled away from the dealership at an astonishing 25 mph. These are the people driving on our roads? These grayhairs don’t have the reflexes to scratch their ass before it stops itching and I’m supposed to feel safe with them behind the wheel? Please. Euthanasia seems more and more plausible.