DIY Costumes

This time of year everyone is getting their Halloween Costumes ready. But maybe you don’t have any ideas. Here’s a couple Do-It-Yourself costume ideas for those of you that don’t have any ideas.

Hitler: Grow the mustache, wear a brown shirt and boots. Chastise some Jews, Gypsies or Homosexuals. (really it’s the mustache and the inclusion of Gypsies into your normal ostracisation routine that’ll let everyone know what your costume is.)

Lando Calrissian: Wear a cape. Invite your best friend over for dinner. Surprise him with his worst enemy. He’ll get it and you’ll all laugh about it later.

Pokemon Collector: Wear a red/white trucker hat. Throw tennis balls at the costumed kids and scream “Gotta catch ‘em all!” (try not to get arrested)

Johnny Appleseed: Wear a pan on your head. Insist on “spreading your seed” to everyone within listening range.

Sunburn Victim: Dye your skin red. Act hurt every time anyone touches you, but that “special someone” you’re trying to hook up with. Tell her/him they have a “soothing touch”. (can double as Indian costume).

Indian: Get drunk, smoke, sell off your house/apartment/dorm for beads or shiny things. Cry on the walk home when you don’t get laid to simulate your own personal “Trail of Tears”

Indian Giver: After being an Indian for the first night, take everything back the next morning. Insist you were drunk and it doesn’t count.

Fratty McFrattington: Wear a visor. Pop your collar. Act like a douche. Call everyone Chad, Troy or Blake.

Red Sox Fan: Wear a Red Sox hat. Don’t pop your collar. Act like a douche. Call everyone Champ, Spaht or Boss.