The Hottest VCR On The Market Today!

Technicolor introduces the new QualTron 5000 VCR.

Official press release:

Remember the good old days when VCRs reigned supreme? We can bring those days back. We can change the world, one tape at a time.

Tired of this DVD crap? What does that even stand for? The only acronyms you need to know are VHS and VCR and SEX, which is what you’re gonna have when you show off the new QualTron 5000 VCR! Plus, screw new technology. We don’t need more buttons on our remotes. They already have like 4 buttons on them things! And ‘high’ definition? Is that for stoners or something? No offense to stoners.

With the new QualTron 5000 VHS Tape Player, your friends will be lining up to give you handjobs while you both watch Titanic on 2 cassette tapes.

The QualTron 5000 VHS video cassette tape player is the most advanced – and only – VCR on the market today.

So dust off those Best of’s of your favorite show with two episodes per tape on them. Feel again the joy of rewinding. And sit through all those previews you always enjoyed.

With a little imagination and a few hits from a bong, you can also watch DVDs on this sucker!*

*You can put DVDs in the cassette port, but they will not play.

**The QualTron is hi-awesome! Super VCR video cassette recorder VHS video home system tape player for life!