The Game of Life

Two guys playing the boardgame The Game of Life

Jim: 1, 2, 3, 4…alright! My wife has another baby, that’s three kids!

Dave: Nice man, my turn. (spins spinner) 1, 2, 3…“you have become disillusioned with your life and start drinking more to hide your depression.” Oh…

Jim: SUCKS FOR YOU MAN my turn. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. Nice, I get a raise! Everything is turning up Jimmy.

Dave: Uh, great, yea, my turn I guess. 1, 2…“You are too depressed to have sex and your wife starts cheating on you.” What the fuck man, when the fuck did Milton Bradley add that?

Jim: Quit whining. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, eleventy billion. “You are now boning Dave’s wife.” Yessss sucka, that’s extra bone-a-tude.

Dave: Dude what the fuck? Why are we even doing this, isn’t it kinda queer for two guys to playing Life anyways?

Jim: Just spin it bitch.

Dave: …and did they really have my name written down? 1, 2. “You start mixing anti-depressents with alcohol.” Yea great, why not. Seriously can’t we just quit and, like, go out and drink or something?

Jim: You’re just pissed cause you’re losing. 1, 2, 3, 4, 7, infinity – “Dave’s wife divorces him and gets the house. And then she gives you the house cause you nail her oh so good.”

Dave: That’s bullshit man, I’m calling shenanigans – let me see that…oh wow, Milton Bradley really is pretty descriptive. Ok, fine, whatever, this is gay anyway. (spins) 1…“You overdose and are found dead in the gutter. Nobody shows up to your funeral. Not even your kids, which aren’t really yours anyways.” Alright fuck Life, fuck you, and fuck Milton I quit.

Jim: You don’t quit faggot, you lose!

Dave: I fingered your girlfriend once.