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Hot, Shaking, Sore

by Harris on

It’s amazing how sexy words can also be applied to a sickly fever. Unfortunately, I’m not using the words to describe sexy time, but rather, the state of my body due to my disease, virus, or infection.


It’s weird how sick can have such a positive connotation in our minds.
Look at that girl to the left. Don’t get too excited. That’s a good time? Really?


We use the word “sick” to describe an action so dangerous that only someone mentally ill would attempt it. Yet when they survive, it’s fine to appreciate the action.


People also use the word “sick” to describe something so obscene and gross that it must be linked to cool fun.


That model up there is on the floor next to what looks like vomit. That was a sick party. Beautiful people consumed enough poison to kill a pterodactyl. AWESOME. I bet some greasy guy got with a girl who had no interest in him, but thought his penis was a funnel. There are plenty of other ways to start conversations with girls and have fun. Maybe not girls that hot, but they have more personality. I swear. On my site, I offer some ideas of how to get girls by going after girls who like you, using pickup lines, and impressing girls with objects, skills, and confidence.

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Whiny inmate

I worked at a prison as a corrections officer (prison guard) and there was a particular inmate there who always complained about everything. For three months I endured his rants on how the lights were too bright, the rooms too hot, the blankets too scratchy, and so on. Obviously this is prison and no one gets luxury accommodations. I reached the end of my rope one morning... Read More » when I had to go down the run and wake him up at 7 AM for transport somewhere else in the state for a medical procedure. The guy is all grumpy, complaining about how I'm getting him up at the "ass crack of dawn." He demanded to be allowed time to take a shower, heat and drink some coffee and have a smoke. The van taking him away was already waiting for him and I knew for a fact that he'd taken a shower before going to bed the night before. I told him there wasn't time for any of that, he just had to get dressed and get to the van. He begins swearing and ranting about how inhumanely we were treating him and after months of his complaints I couldn't hold it in anymore. "I know, it sucks how early you have to get up to get your free medical care, huh?" I told him. He was immediately silent . He got dressed and left in a huff. I later found out how he wrote a grievance to the warden about my comment. Inmate complaints are occasionally reason for worry, so I was nervous when the warden called me in to his office. It turned out he just thought my comment was hilarious and told me to keep up the good work.