Roommate Confessions

Start your week off right with Roommate Confessions, your best source for disgusting tricks and awesome pranks.

My room gets really hot in the winter, even with the thermostat all the way down. My roommate’s solution is to sleep completely topless (I mean completely), which is reeeally awkward for me. I mentioned that to her, but she called me a prude and kept doing it. So, one time when she was asleep and just asking for it, I took a few pictures and posted them online. I haven’t decided if I should tell her.
Girl, School of Visual Arts

The guys I lived with my freshman year were ass holes. They would always make a mess and leave it. One day I decided to use all of their OxyClean to do my laundry. Instead of buying the some new, I just took the old container, filled it with sugar, and put it back in their room. They never noticed a difference, and I never told them.
Brandon, University of KY

The room next to us was messy and loud all year. Come Christmas time, our RA put nice big red Christmas stockings on each of our doors. It gets cold in MN during winter, so trust me, the old heater’s always blasting hot, thick air. Fed up with our messy neighbors, my roommate and I pooped a small nugget each and, under the guise of a simple hall passer-bye, slipped the nuggets into our neighbor’s stocking. The two guys searched through ALL of the clothes piles around the dirty room, looking feverishly because it smelled like “someone literally crapped right in our room.” The hot thick air from the heater coated the entire dorm room in a turdy haze for a week before the two finally found out what Santa had put in their stocking.
Will, School Not Given

I ran out of booze one night, so I drank some of your Blue Curacao. I didn’t want you to notice, so I topped the bottle off with Scope.
Wayne, University of Calgary

Our Junior year I slept with my roommate’s alcoholic mom. Yes dude, I did your mom. Since then, every time I’ve told you, “Whatever, I fucked your mom”, I wasn’t lying. That’s why the joke is so funny.
CBGB, Villanova

Don’t forget to send your confessions to RoommateConfessions@GMail.com