Tom Brady
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Thomas Edward Patrick Brady, Jr. (born August 3, 1977) is an American football quarterback for the New England Patriots of the National Football League. You can’t tell by looking at him. He looks more like a seedy attorney. [citation needed]
History
In 1977, Tom and Galynn Brady gave birth to their unplanned chid, Tom. In High School, he was called names like “Tom Gay-dy” or “Tom Gay” or his least favorite, just simply “Gay.” He didn’t hit puberty until his freshman year at Michigan. He was picked for the NFL draft in the Sixth round. SIXTH ROUND! That’s no first round like some famous quaterback…
Playing Career
Tom doesn’t actually know the rules of football, he just knows when he has done something well, he is given a Milkbone. In the previous Super Bowl, Tom watched the “Puppy Bowl“ on Animal Planet. He claims, it “inspired” him. Tom suffers from Irritable Bowel Syndrome. This isn’t related to his playing career, we just didn’t have section for “diarrhea.”
Family
Tom Brady’s brother pretty much sucks at QB. His father didn’t have a 67.1 QB rating. And his mother’s name is Galynn, lol.
Personal Life
Tom dated Bridget Moynahan for two years. There, she suffered from blindness, not seeing his goofy face blankly staring at her. In 2006, they ended, after she recieved Lasik eye surgery. In early 2007, Moynahan announced she was pregnant with Tom’s bastard child. Tom threw the baby 51 yards, which was quite impressive. Currently, he is dating Gisele Bundchen. Bundchen is German for “very attracted to average football players who have children out of wedlock,” or “alliance.”
External Links
Eli Manning’s Myspace…Friend Me!!!
Topics
Sports
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