An Open Letter to The Daily Sun concerning our PaperBoy

Hello,
I recently moved to this Easy Street 2 weeks ago. We were tired of big cities and wanted to absorb some local color by subscribing to your paper. I must say, I was very impressed with the training regimine that you put your paperboy’s through. (Although, I think we could build a mall or something where the training course is…) In New York, we were lucky to get our paper at all, let alone in the mailbox. The first week was great, our paper was delivered either at our door or on our doorstep. It wasn’t until Sunday that I opened the paper and saw the top headline “Paperboy wins award for outstanding deliery” that I realized what a mistake subscribing was. There is a war going on, elections and poverty an your paper talks about the paperboy?

I cancelled our subscription immediately and decided we would just read the internet. On Monday morning, a paper sailed through my window. I called to complain and the person, Mr. Robinson, denied it was his company, even though it was his paper. The next morning, another paper sailed through my window and I clearly saw this blond haired punk riding through my flowers. Again, I called to complain, but nothing. Another person picked up and told me the paperboy had made all of his deliveries and asked if I wanted to re-new my subscription.

I have a very nice victorian house and over the next few days, I had three windows broken, my trash knocked over and he even threw a paper at my son who was breakdancing outfront. This is mob war fare and I will not take it anymore. You are intimidating people into buying your paper. You obviously have paid off the police as they do nothing. Furthermore, there are only 12 houses on our street, why do you feel the need to leave bundles of papers every 4 houses? How can you make a profit it you’re using 30 papers for 12 subscribers?

A few neighbors have had the same problem, and I promise, that we will ban together to keep your paperboy from doing his job. I will leave traps in my garden, continually back my car in and out of the driveway and let my dogs out to chase him. You want a fight, then you have gotten one!

Sincerly,

Janice,
202 Easy St