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Sean Curry

Back From Break

by Sean Curry on

DUUDES! MY DUDES! How the hell are you guys, how was your break? Awesome, yeah,  me too, I had a totally awesome blow-out spring break. Just decided to go for broke, let loose, ya feel me?

What? Mexico? Nah, bro, everyone goes there. Florida? Please! I was going there when I was like 8, that place is totally dead now. Oh, I just, y’know, kicked it right here in Jersey, man. No, I went home. Yeah, Rutherford. WHAT? NO WAY, MAN, BREAK RULED!

I lived with these two friends of mine that I’ve lived with before, I just crashed at their place. It was really cool because they paid for everything and didn’t even ask me to throw in for food or anything! Totally boss. Yeah, they had a pool, too, but theirs is covered up right now. For… repairs… cause we did so much partying in it last summer, BOY! YEAH!

You went to a mardi gras party? Tight bro, bet you saw a lot of tittays, pretty sweet. How many, like 6, 8 boobs? 64 boobs? That’s great and all, I- 64 pairs of boobs? Wow, that’s like- yeah, I was just gonna say- yeah… Well, that’s awesome and all, man, but guess how many I saw? 874 boobs, my man, 874! Yeah I found this awesome website. Bet they didn’t have much wireless internet in Me-hee-co, eh? Oh they did? Yeah, but probably just- oh, right there at the resort, huh? Cool.

Ludacris was there? You were front row at a- you were backstage? That’s pretty cool, but get this- I was at four different Ludacris concerts and a Foo Fighters concert! Yup, my two roommates had just gotten On Demand and I was all over the Concert Channel, brosef. Yeah, I was front row, back stage, in the rafters, everything dude. Even got an interview with Luda. Hella tight. He’s really- well, yeah, Sway did, but it was really insightful.

I made some mad bank, too. Yeah I was… doing maintenance at this… resort. Yeah, you know, basic grounds maintenance, stuff like that. They let me stay there for free and everything, though, so it was cool. What? Yeah, my two friends, uh, own the resort. No, it’s kind of small, you haven’t heard of- no, I…

Whatever man, spring break is what you make of it. What? Shut up.

I cannot wait for summer.

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Admiral D!ck

I use to work at a Military Rec. Center in the boat rental. The rules were easy 1.first come first serve, 2.rank does not matter, 3.and have a military id, will travel; they could rent boats and go fishing or partying. 6 months prior to graduating boot camp a group of marines reserved the "party barge" (BIG a$$ pontoon) this also happened to be Memorial Weekend.... Read More » Soo, the fresh little newbie's have loaded up the party barge with beer and what not and this Navy Admiral walks up without reservations and orders them to "Disembark and relinquish" the boat. All the new marines snap to attention and start unloading. The admiral than orders them to leave there fishing equipment and beer to save him time and expense. Seeing this I walk up and inform the Admiral "no reservations, no boat, your sol." Admiral orders to see my boss (I am the boss) and say "go to the big white house in DC and file your complaint there" Admiral "What's your name and rank! I'll have you marshaled!" Me "my name is ___" having no rank because I'm a civilian I stick my butt out and while pointing to my posterior "my rank is kiss this." Mr. Admiral d!ck wad storms off mumbling something about MPs and I help the marines out of the dock and with them a happy party. I do so love p!ssing of military officers.