Prepare the Cabin for Takeoff

As the hundreds of billions of colleges around this country prepare to go on Spring Break, here’s an interesting dialogue to keep in mind as you all embark on your expedia fueled Mexican odysseys:

Pilot: Flight attendants, please prepare the cabin for departure.
Flight Attendant: Ok cabin, here we go. It’s that time again, we’re about to take off. Are you prepared?
Cabin: Fuck no I’m not!!! Are you serious? I’m a giant metal tube; I have no business being 35,000 feet above the surface of this planet! You are one crazy bitch if you think I’m prepared for anything, let alone takeoff.
Flight Attendant: Heyyyy now, calm down, calm down. You did it on the way here; I know you can do it.
Cabin: Bullshit. The way here was a fluke. I’ll never make it again.
Flight Attendant: Come now, that’s not the kind of attitude I’m used to. Who’s a big cabin, huh? Who can do it now?
Cabin: I’m a big cabin I guess… I still don’t think this will ever work though. It doesn’t make any fucking sense.
Flight Attendant: Aww, sure it does. You can do it. Just hold your breath and close your eyes until it’s all over.
Cabin: Yea… yea I guess.
Flight Attendant (to pilot): Cabin prepared for departure.