1. If you are going to jerk off in the bathroom LOCK THE DOOR
2. What constitutes as a good Blow J has severely changed since 1982
3. It doesn't matter how short the sex is it can still ruin your life.
4. Even if your best friend gets the girl you like pregnant and she has an abortion, you may still like her.
5. Spicoli proves that stoners are very clever
6. Even a television repair man's Ultimate set of tools can't fix a car you wrecked
7. Some pizza companies will deliver to high school classrooms
8. When a guy has an orgasm about a quart comes out.