"How Do I Rewind the DVD?"

My grandmother called me up and said that the arrow on her screen wasn’t working. I asked if she had plugged in her mouse and she told me she had plugged BOTH in. She thought you needed one for your right hand and one for your left.
From Liz, SUNY Stony Brook

My mom thought that Mozilla Firefox was a computer virus.
From Will, College of Charleston

I was working at my school’s phone-a-thon and one of the outgoing answering machine messages I heard was, “We’re not here, but don’t leave a message because we don’t know how to hear them.”
From Kevin, Loyola College

My dad calls his new iPod Touch his “mypodtouch.”
From Brendan S., McMaster University

And a very special Parents Just Shouldn’t Try to Understand:

I was playing GTA IV when my Dad walked in and said, “Jeez, you better stop running all those red lights or the cops are gonna get mad.”
As if the drug dealer I just ran over wasn’t a big deal.
From DJ, Western Oregon