THE PRESENT

Producer 1:  We're screwed, Seth Rogen and that Apatow guy have us over a barrel here. We need fresh, new ideas.

Producer 2: Over a barrel?

Producer 1: No time to explain expression, we need new movie ideas stat.

Producer 2: Got it, (Buzzes unattractive Secretary) get me Steven Spielberg!

Producer 1: You sure about this?

Produce 2: The man wrote Indiana Jones, I'm sure he can write something that hasn't been done.

Producer 1: I think you're on to something here.

INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL

Producer 1: That son of a….


2 YEARS EARLIER

Producer 1: That Will Ferrel is killing us. We need fresh ideas ASAP.

Producer 2: I'm on it, (Buzzes Previous Secretary, more attractive, sexual harrassment lawsuit follows.) get me Sylvester Stallone!

Producer 1: You sure about that? The guy barely speaks English.

Producer 2: The man wrote Rocky and Rambo, both started with R, both kicked ass.

Producer 1: Point made.

Producer 2: He's like those mental patients that paint, people will buy it for money. And there's no one more creative than the insane, except the deranged.

ROCKY BALBOA AND RAMBO

Producer 2: I'm going to effing kill that mongoloid.


5 YEARS PRIOR

Arnold Schwarzenegger: (Austro-American accent) I'm telling you, no one wants to see another Terminator! It's a stupid idea, you're stupid!

Producer 1: You'll make what we tell you to make or you'll be deported so fast it will make your head spin. Now get out of here. Go read a book or something. Now let me read this script, Superbad? The kids will never go for it. (Buzzes ridiculously hot Secretary, future Mrs. Producer 1) Get me Bruce Willis. The world needs another Die Hard. Someday.

OUTSIDE STUDIO

Politician: Excuse me Mr. Schwarzenegger!

Arnold: Yes?

Politician: How would you like to run for governor? All you have to do is beat Gary Coleman and a stripper.

Arnold: I'll do it, there's just one more thing I have to take care of.

TERMINATOR 3: RISE OF THE MACHINES

Producer 1: I smell a TV show in there somewhere.

Producer 2: It will never happen.

TERMINATOR: THE SARAH CONNOR CHRONICLES