Preface: I was hammered drunk, like my brain was taking a cold shower in straight Jager and Dr.Pepper. About the time my brain was about to wipe himself clean and call it a night my penis jumped into said shower. Much to my brain's dismay Penis was still awake and looking for some action. Given Penis's and Brain's alcohol indued state anything was up for the night. This is how the "Come, Taste this, Come it tastes good" story begins.

Ok so heres the scene: Myself and several of my fraternity brothers are leaving happy hour to go to some sorority party they were throwing for us, it had a girly name too boot "Sweets for Sweeties". yeah about as cliche as a honey moon in hawaii and geting fucked on the beach while neal diamond sings 'Hello'. So anyway, we get my friend Nate who i call N-Dawg immediatly vomited 20 bucks of liqour outside their house before we went in and i shamelessly urinated into an open window on the side of the house. It was that kind of happy hour. So we get in after relieving ourselves from every hole our bodies can use to expell the poisonous alcohol we spent so much time drinking. This party was basically a "Hey, you guys were really sweet to help us with our charity stuff can we thank you by having a party and hooking up with yall? " So the party is going well, first couple hours and people start missing, rather than file a missing person report i start placing condoms in closets and in every bedroom, ya know just incase… I get denied by bitches (Note: your only a bitch if your deny me) for a while until i get a definate read on one girl. Standard insecurity issues, too much makeup, not enough clothes, and her friends had gotten picked up before she had.

If i had to sum it up in military terms it would go down like this:

Penis: target acquired, i'm going in, Brain i need tactical overviews on how to begin my approach.

Brain: Roger Penis, this is brain, shouldnt be too long until i crack her code. Starting with a standard verbal communication and then i'll initiate physical touch, over.

Penis: Confirmed Brain, I spot em you drop em!

This girl was all about putting my junk inside trunk. We move to a more secluded spot to "talk" more, we head to the kitchen which is packed with Hostess products (remember the theme). Brain cracks the code and Penis storms the palace gates. After a minute i am straight up getting blown like a trailer in the middle united states, hard. She told me to courtesy tap ( welcome to fucking middle school) whatever. I feel the urge and start looking for something to blow on. my natural urge is to blow it on her face right in the middle of the party, because that would be awesome having my jizm on display at this party. but shes a sorority girl and that kind of shit would get me blacklisted.

So anyway i dont think of anything to blow my load in or on. I tap and my natural instinct was to grab the first thing on my right, it was a twinkie. I shove my cock in it and blow a sick, sick 8 roper all inside the twinkie. I dont know what i was thinking, but i ruined a perfectly good twinkie and got my dick covered in sweet cream (Lolerskates). She licks it off, bonus of the mistake.

I was about to throw the twinkie away when she tells me to stop. I thought she was going to eat it! And that would have been either the hottest or the grossest thing ever. But she doesnt (weak) she instead takes the twinkie and takes the cream / cum mixup and puts it ontop of a cupcake. NO FUCKING WAY, YEAH FUCKING WAY! But get this shit she actually tells me "I'm going to save this for later." SERIOUSLY WHAT THE FUCK, WHAT KIND OF CUM FREAK HAVE I MET. its at this point that i start laughing uncontrollably and i leave the party. I told my friends later the next day. Two of them confirmed they had also fucked her and said that she asked for facials and PLAYED WITH THEIR CUM LIKE IT WAS SILLY PUDDY. Shit gets weird sometimes….