Leprechaun: Psst. Need some luck?

Boy: Who are you?

Leprechaun: I'm a leprechaun, asshole. What did you think? The Irish Gary Coleman?

Boy: Point taken.

Leprechaun: Here, try this out. It's a lucky rabbit's foot.

Boy: Aw gee! This is fantastic. And you say it'll give me luck?

Leprechaun: You bet your balls it will.

Boy: Aw gee! Got any more?

Leprechaun: Yeah, I got three.

(Dumps out bag, showing a rabbit with one leg amputated)

Leprechaun: Which one will it be?

Boy: I… I dunno. That's pretty intense.

Leprechaun: You want to be lucky, don't you?

Boy: I just never thought about where the legs came from.

Leprechaun: Surprise.

Boy: Can't you give me something else? You're a leprechaun. Surely there's something else.

Leprechaun: Yeah, no problem.

(Cuts open rabbit's stomach. Pennies spill out)

Leprechaun: Lucky penny?

Boy: Ugh!

Leprechaun: This one has your birth year on it.