beer for dinner!

-Yo! Shit, it’s like 6 and i aint got no money, I got these brews though. Whats up bro? tryin to chill…. yeah, i got these brews, tryin to start drinkin real quick, ya know, get the night started. Oh, you got homework? Shit, aw no problem dude, hit me up when you’re done we’ll fuckin raaaage yah. oh you gona be in allnight? shittt no prob dude, good luck hittin them books SHIT haha.. OH yeah dude peace out. Take it easy, and if it’s easy take it twice! Know what im sayin? hello? yeaah, peace man.

-Yo! Bro! Whats up dude? shittt i’m so wasted, I’ve slammed like at least 6 millers in the past 45 minutes. Shit, I know, intense as fuck. Yeah so what you up to, tryin to drink some brewwws with your bro? .. Oh, you’re girlfriends comin over? Oh, shit, no problem dude. she can have some brews too, ya know, if you wanna bring her up, show her a little bit of the wild side youuu know. Oh, you guys rented a flick? american beauty? sheittt that movie is pretty tight, I would totes bang that daughter character, ya know, showin off the titties and shit. Spacey def shoulda nailed that skank though, ya know? Kaaiser SOZEEE that hoe.. Oh, you’re about to start it.. I mean i’ll come up and check it out for a lil.. I love that one sex scene with the wife, bitch straight WANTED IT ya know? ohh, you guys are just gonna put it on and fall asleep? oh nah bro thats cool, I’ll just hit the bars, ya know, pretty wasted already. Peace bro, hit me up for some GTA in the am!! I’m totes down to start rocket launchin some PO-NINEEE FUCK THE PO right? oh, you really gotta go? yea word man I’ll see you tomorrow.. yup bye.


-DUUDE!!! SHIT!! you at tthe bars?? I’ve just been straight gettin wasted alllll night bro. twelve o miller to the FACE! how the ladies out there? fine as fuck? DAMN! sheittt im about to be there man, but yo, actually, I forgot, I lost my fake.. yeah I gave it to my dude from back home.. yeah.. you think thats gonna be a prob.. I mean you know the bartender right so its all cool right?? well.. shit.. i mean I did pass out at the bar last time but come on, common mistake right! totes… oh. it’s the same bartender? .. he says he remembers my face? well shitt just tell him to chill on it i mean it aint no thaang, everyone gets their one free pass, right? I mean I had been slammin beers for like 3 HOURS beforehand, ya know? …oh, he remembers all three times? well shit, I guess bad luck hits all of us at one point or another ..Oh shit nahh dont worry about it bro I’ll just kick it in the dorms, straight wasted.. call up my girl or somethin.. we’ll kick it soon.. hello? you there?..

-KELLY!!! YO its me dan from the formal.. yea I gave you those cherry bombs to you and your friends, yeah… fuckin SHIT! fuckin tricky ass motehr fuckin VOICEMAILS!! BITCHES@!! oh.. hey kelly, this is dan from the Alpha tau social.. Just straicht chizzillllllin in my room tonight wonderin what youre gettin into.. hit me up if you wanna get wild…haha just kiddin but if you wanna chill sometime i’d be down, ya know just watch a movie or whatever, maybe american beauty? flick is tight… HIT ME UP


-outside-
YOO bro I hate to do this man but you think you could bum me a cig? … oh that was your last one? really? I mean I just thought I saw your pack bro with at least like… 14 cigs.. oh thats your buddies pack and youre just borrowing it? oh naw man thats cool, i mean its your bro’s pack you can’t be bummin ciggs, ya know? HAH! SHITTTT im straight drunk right now bout to just hit up some late night Wendy’s ya know? straight GRIND on some mothafuckin JBCCCC’s… take it easy brah, and if it’s easy take it like AHHAHA a bunch of timesd ya know? PEEAACCCEEEE!!



-passes out in alley on way to Wendy’s-