Sibling Rivalry

Lefty: Lower than you, Jingle Balls! Haha!

Right: Man, that was even funnier the first 328,000 times.

Lefty: Whatevs, you’re just jealous.

Right: Of what?

Lefty: Of the fact that the GF paid a lil’ more attention to me last night than to you, but can you blame her?

Right: What are you talking about?

Lefty: I totally received some extra cuppage…. it was sweet.

Right: She was not cupping you; she was focusing on the big guy.

Member: You guys talking about me?

Lefty: Leave yourself out of this, Hank! You really can’t stand that the chicks dig me, can you?

Righty: We’re testicles, Lefty. We sweat profusely, we’re hairy, and we occasionally stick to the side of the thighs. I’m pretty sure we’re the last thing chicks want to “dig.”

Lefty: Whatevs, man. The chicks totally want the Leftman. Last week the ole’ GF was treating me like I was an everlasting gobstopper. You totally missed it.

Righty: I find that hard to believe since we’re sharing the same scrotum!

Lefty: Stop being such a baby, little bro.

Righty: For the last time, I am NOT your “little bro!” We are the exact same age, you moron.

Lefty: I descended a full two days before you, my friend. And what a wonderful two days they were! Free room and board all to myself!

Righty: Well it’s no picnic for me, either. Your lump keeps jabbing my side.

Lefty: What lump?

Righty: That lump that you got over there.

Lefty: Wait, what? OMG are fricking serious?! A lump! Alump! I can’t have a lump!!! The Leftman is in his prime!!!! I can’t be taken out of the game now!!! OMG what the hell am I going to do!

Righty: Ha! Got ya, bitch!

Lefty: You are such an asshole.

Asshole: Hey, you guys talking about me?

Lefty: F*ck off, Gary.