Desperate Measures

knock knock knock
Brain: Hold on…hold on. I’m coming, sheesh.
Brain opens door
Body: Hey man…h-hey.
Brain: Jesus, Body. What time is it?
Body: It’s nine at night, man.
Brain: This is when I rest, Body, you know that. What gives?
Body: I just, I just need a little bit of endorphin, man. J-just a little bit.
Brain: Ok ok, take it easy. What is he doing right now?
Body: Watching TV, man. Come on, I just need a little.
Brain: Listen, I’m not just gonna give you any endorphins without any stimuli. What is he watching?
Body: 60 Minutes.
Brain goes to close the door
Body: Ok ok, let’s make a deal, man, ok? Let’s make a deal. OK, h-here’s the deal. You give me some endorphins now, and then I promise he’ll go to the gym or something once he feels starts feelin it. Cool?
Brain: That’s not how it works, Body. You know that.
Body: I know, b-but what do you want me to do?! He just SITS there, watching 60 Minutes. I need those endorphins, man!
Brain: What about sex? I can kick out some endorphins for that.
Body: Chicken and the egg, man.
Brain: Well look, I don’t give this stuff out for free. Get his act together and come back later.
Body: L-let’s talk about this, man. Let’s talk about what I can do for you. How about I walk to the library tomorrow, would you like that, man?
Brain: Goodnight, Body.
Body: Listen, I- I didn’t want to do to this…
Brain: Hey…HEY, what are you doing?
breaks finger
Brain: You f*cking psycho!
Body: GIVE ME THOSE ENDORPHINS!
Brain: Alright fine, HERE! Take your beloved endorphins, Jesus.
Body: Ohhh, yeaaaah. N-nice, man, nice. Life is looking better already.
Brain: You know they don’t last forever, right?
Body: Just, shh, man. Let him enjoy this. 60 Minutes just got twice as exciting.
Brain: Now go to the gym, Body.
Body: Why would I go to the gym when I already have endorphins?
Body sprints away as Brain sadly watches him go
Brain: Dammit, my finger. I guess a few little endorphins can’t hurt, right?