I am the biggest loser on the planet.

So I finally DID find a job, at Taco Bell… my dream job is to work at GameCrazy but as you know my granny FUCKED THAT UP. Anyways, there’s a bunch of fine little high school bitches who work at Taco Bell and I was staring at them all day and I couldn’t take it anymore so I went in the cooler real quick and started wacking my pud. Well the fucking stupid-ass douche bag assistant manager walked in and caught me, he freaked out, then I freaked out and ran with my boner still out, thru the work area, thru the lobby with all of the customers in it and out to the main road where I finally managed to get my pee-pee back in my Taco Bell work pants. I think they called the cops but I’m not sure, I’m kinda worried they are gonna put a warrant for my arrest, there were kids in the lobby, as well as old people…. I was gonna go back and ask if I could still work there but I’m pretty sure I’m fired. I dunno though I might call them.