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Andrew Bridgman

FreakierLinks

by Andrew Bridgman on


Operation Freakout – Turns out Scientology is even more psychotic and evil than you knew! Good luck, Suri Cruise. You’re gonna need it.

The Miracle of the Sun – The desert level from Mario 3 was based on real events! Will it soon be socially acceptable for me to wear my frog suit in public? Please?

The Denver Airport- News Flash! Airports suck. But the Denver Airport sucks just a littttttle harder.

The Bible Code – God got bored while he was writing the Bible and decided to turn it into a crossword puzzle. I wish he would have turned it into a sudoku or connect-the-dots, that would’ve been way better. Regardless, I finally have something to keep me occupied in church.

The REAL Truth Behind 9/11!!!- This is what aired in France the morning of September 11th, 2001. Are you ready to know the TRUTH? Was it bin Laden? Nope. George W. Bush? Nuh-uh. Iran? Iraq? Russia? Canada? Ecuador?! Not even close. The truth is far more horrifying than you can ever imagine.

May the Jihad be with you.

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Andrew Bridgman

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A Christmas Larceny

I used to work for a chinese computer company that no longer exists; one Christmas Eve a man comes into the store right as we are closing and counting money and insists that we start up the Point of Sale system again and sell him the video card he reserved online. We tell him that the computers have been shut down and all the transactions of the day batched and sent to the... Read More » credit card vendor. He keeps telling us that it's already paid for etc. and we keep telling him we can't process any more transactions until the morning of Dec. 26th. He then takes out a revolver and makes us lay on the floor while he steals the cash drawers and takes off. Turns out he had in fact reserved the video card online and his full name, address and phone number were in the system along with his email address; i bet his New Year sucked.