Seriously, McDonald's… seriously. I'm supposed to believe that Olympic Athletes eat your southern style chicken biscuit sandwich for breakfast; a food item that happens to contain 20g of total fat and 1180 mg of sodium. Really?! I don't know about you, but I generally avoid dousing my morning cereal with half my daily recommended salt intake. Chicken for breakfast… COME ON. You should be ashamed of yourself.

Speaking of your commercials… you expect me to swallow this? Brazilian psychedelic music is a little out of your wheelhouse. It doesn't work. I think I liked you better back when you were shamelessly pandering to minorities. At least one of the Portuguese words in this song sounds exactly like "salmonella" (0:52). And you hear it right when a little kid takes a bite of food! Mmmmm… dangerous.