Poker

 
A phone rings
 
Guy1: (Answers) Hello? Hey baby. I’m playing poker. Can I call you back?
Guy2: (Rolls eyes and looks at Guy3)
Guy1: (Gives Guy2 the finger) Kay. Kay, baby. I love you.
Guy3: (Whispers inaudibly to Guy2)
Guy2: (Chuckles)
Guy1: (Angrily) Shut up you guys. No, baby. Not you. I love you too.
Guy2: (Groans)
Guy1: (Quietly) I said I love you. I did say it already, you weren’t listening. I know. No, no. I’ll say it again, I love you.
Guy3: Jesus.
Guy1: (Turning away and whispering) I wanna snuzzle you too. I’ll be there in an hour. 40 minutes.
Guy3: Come on, dude.
Guy1: (Shoots Guy3 an agitated look and turns away again) I’m your cuddle bunnie. (Louder) I’m your cuddle bunnie.
Guy2: What the fuck?
Guy1: Fluffy muffin lollipop. Ginger bug.
Guy3: What are you doing?
Guy1: (Angrily turns to Guy3) Shut up! (Turns away) Tickle your belly button? Yeah. Eskimo kissy.
Guy2: Alright that’s enough!
Guy1: (Turns back) Seriously dude, I’ll slit your throat. Give me 20 seconds. I swear to God, shut up right now or I’m going to kick you in the forehead.
Guy2: (Looks shocked and confused)
Guy1: (Whispering loudly into phone) I love you so much. Butterfly sprinkles. (Louder) Strawberry balloon popsicle.
Guy2: Dude! What are you doing?!
Guy1: (Turns and punches Guy2 in the face) You wanna go? Honestly, I’m going to stab each one of you tonight. Give me 20 God damn seconds here, okay? (Into phone) You wanna whisker scratchy? Cotton ball hugs? I love you so much. Bye, baby. (Turns to table and looks at cards) I’ll fold.