Some assembly suggested.
I almost hit a female deer on my way home last night. I guess she didn’t like my cologne.
Sarah Palin was right when she said her son with down syndrome is a gift from God, now she has a family member more intelligent and informed than she is.
Answers to questions you already know by listening to music
-How do you spell respect?-War: what is it good for?
-If it’s like this and like that and like that and uh, and then it’s like that and like this and like that and uh, and then it’s like this, than who gives a f*ck about those?
I’ve always wondered why Ultimate Fighter title belts are so big. Most people I know don’t brag about having received brain damage.
Do you think in China they celebrate Don’t Bring Your Daughter to Work Day?
People that wear lanyards around their neck are wearing the gold medal for douchebaggery.
Turnabout is fair play
In the ’60s and ’70s, people used acid to make the world look different. Now today, people take Prozac to make it look normal.I think that if I were vampire I would floss a lot because there is no better way to get blood. Unless you’re a girl… they have terrible gums.
The 8 Kinds of Christmas Cards
Dating Dos and Don'ts
10 Roommate Red Flags
Amazing Dad Magic
The 8 Stages of Staying Up All Night
Flowchart: Do You Like Me?
Spending your Valentine's Day on the internet? This will make everything better.
Thoughts on Valentine's Day from people who are paid to be cynical bastards.
The 3D makes this movie look real...ly sucky
Your pet says a lot about you. But then, you have a gossipy parrot.
Guys try to surf without water, and somehow succeed.
Ice T is good, but this time of year it's all about CoCo
Yeah! And why did Microsoft make Bing when they can just use Google?
Valentine's Day was simpler back then. And creepier.
Hey! Get your real world out of my internet!
These guys are getting called out by the reeferee.
