Omelet: Pros: Delicious. Cons: Difficult to make. Nothing makes you feel better than cooking a delicious omelet, besides eating the delicious omelet. The main problem is that who the hell has all the needed delicious ingredients in their apartment? Second cooking an omelet is a very precise art that is somewhat difficult to master.

Sunny Side Up: Pros: Delicious. Cons: Sometimes runny and gross. I think runny eggs are gross.

Over Easy: Pros: Delicious. Cons: Sunny Side Up eaters think you're a bitch. They're all like, "who the hell flips a Sunny Side Up. That guy over there is a bitch." Or maybe I just had a bad experience.

Hard Boiled: Pros: Meh. Cons: Lame as hell. Seriously, can you look at a man eating Hard Boiled eggs and not call them a joke? Except on a salad. They're tight on a salad.

Poached: Pros: Don't really understand what poached is. Cons: Probably tastes bad.

Deviled: Pros: If you're around deviled eggs your probably also around much better hor'dourves. Cons: You have to sit through a boring ass wedding. Sucks to be you. The cake is stale so eat all the food you can get now. It's acceptable to pocket the food (your suit was dry-cleaned, remember? It's sterile)

Egg Salad: Pros: You can find it basically anywhere. Cons: Chicken Salad and Tuna Salad are so much better.