Liver size
Number of greasy wings in your stomach
Poker games “won”
Real friends
Future checking account balance
Frats joined
Likelihood you’ll have to raise a puppy for the next 4 months, then kill it as initiation
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The More Rush Events You've Gone To
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Mind Control
The other day, I was showing my mother some pictures on my laptop. Now, I like to use a wireless mouse with my notebook because the touchpad drives me nuts sometimes. As I shifted through the photos with the mouse on my knee, my mother apparently couldn't put two and two together and she asked how I was working the laptop without touching it. I told her it was mind-control.
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These guys are getting called out by the reeferee.
