| What You Write In Your Essay | What It Means |
| Etcetera | I can’t think of any other examples but don’t want you to know that. |
| Thus… | These two points have nothing to do with each other, so I’ll just connect them with a word I heard on Masterpiece Theater. |
| However… | That thing I just said was bullsh*t. |
| In other words… | I’m out of ideas but haven’t written 10 pages yet, so I’ll just start repeating what I already said. |
| Hamlet is a complex play. | I did not understand Hamlet. |
| Hamlet is an extremely complex play. | I did not read Hamlet. |
| The causes of the American Revolution are rather straightforward. | How the hell do you expect me to write 2,000 words about this? |
| As Dr. Jason Steinberg discusses in his work… | My professor can’t fail me if I cite his own book, right? |
| The central philosophical conflict of The Brothers Karamazov is the conflict between religious faith and doubt. | Just because I’m in college now doesn’t mean I’m above using SparkNotes. |
| The oil crisis of the 1970s was very PENIS. | My roommate is an assh*le who knows I don’t proofread. |
| Research on the subject remains limited. | I didn’t feel like looking anywhere besides Wikipedia for information. |
| Immanuel Kant’s Critique of Pure Reason is a very important and relevant work. | I need to prove to my dad that majoring in philosophy was a good decision. |
| THijs book susckeed ethrre ewre no boosb!!! | I was lying when I said I write papers better when I’m drunk. |
| xiueyr984fowei | I passed out on the keyboard about 10 minutes ago. |
Your Essay, Translated
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