“The Internet is a fad — unlike baseball, with its admirable, steroid-free stars like Jose Canseco and Rafael Palmeiro.”
-Bill Gates, 1995
“No person with his wits about him would ever pay to see moving pictures. Especially if those moving pictures told a story about scientists trapped on a remote South American island of genetically cloned dinosaurs run amok.”
-Nicola Tesla, 1880
“Man? On the moon? That seems about as likely as that new singer Elvis Presley having a daughter, and that daughter growing up and marrying a ghoulish, Peter Pan-obsessed, trans-racial pop-singer accused of child molestation.”
-Walter Cronkite, 1956
“Mark my words: television shall be forgotten by the end of the year. But should it somehow survive and subsequently air a comedic program about the trials and tribulations of a fellowship of six New Yorkers, Ross and Rachel will not hook up in the end.”
-Charlie Chaplin, 1949
“Vietnam will go down in history as this country’s final war. Now, we look for a return to normalcy. Things like watching television. Specifically Baretta starring Robert Blake — who, incidentally, will most definitely never be tried for the murder of his wife.”
-Jimmy Carter, 1981
How Creepy You Are, as Determined by Your Pets
Flowchart: Do You Like Me?
Christmas Gift Org Charts, Through Life
What Your Ski Tracks Say About You
Dating Dos and Don'ts
10 Ways to Make the Internet Better
Spending your Valentine's Day on the internet? This will make everything better.
Thoughts on Valentine's Day from people who are paid to be cynical bastards.
The 3D makes this movie look real...ly sucky
Your pet says a lot about you. But then, you have a gossipy parrot.
Guys try to surf without water, and somehow succeed.
Ice T is good, but this time of year it's all about CoCo
Yeah! And why did Microsoft make Bing when they can just use Google?
Valentine's Day was simpler back then. And creepier.
Hey! Get your real world out of my internet!
These guys are getting called out by the reeferee.
