The Adventures Of... Extremely Jealous Boyfriend!

Two Girls Sit Late At Night In Their Dorm Rooms

Girl 1: How are things with David?

Girl 2: They’re good. It’s hard being in a long distance relationship. Especially with a boyfriend who’s so… possessive.

Girl 1: Possessive how?

Girl 2: He just gets a little jealous is all. And it’s tough because he lives across the country. He sent me four texts yesterday while I was at cla—

Extremely Jealous Boyfriend Kicks Open Door

Extremely Jealous Boyfriend: Where the f*ck have you been?

Girl 2: Oh my god. David! (Going to hug him)

EJB: Don’t f*cking touch me. Don’t even talk to me.

Girl 2: I’m sorry.

EJB: You really are. (Pointing to Girl 1) What? Is this your boyfriend? Is this a boy or something?

Girl 1: I should go.

EJB: Stop avoiding the question.

Girl 2: David.

EJB: Seriously, don’t talk to me. I’m going back to the other side of America now. I just flew in to see what the hell was going on.

Girl 2: Wait!

EJB: No. My flight is in like… 2 hours.

Girl 2: I love you.

EJB: And now you owe me $550.

Girl 2: I love you.

EJB: Cash. Bye.

Next Week On: The Adventures of Extremely Jealous Boyfriend

Extremely Jealous Boyfriend and His Personal Trainer are in the Gym.

Extremely Jealous Boyfriend is Bench Pressing

Personal Trainer: Come on. One more. You’re gonna be so jacked.

EJB: No shit.

Personal Trainer: Whoa. Your nose is bleeding.

EJB: Jesus. That means she’s talking to some dude.

Personal Trainer: You said she was going to office hours. Maybe that’s just her professor or something.

EJB: That’s not a risk I’m willing to take. Gotta go. And don’t tell anybody I talk to you about her office hours.

Personal Trainer: Sure thing, man. Sure thing.

Extreme Jealous Boyfriend sprints out of the gym, knocking over a basketball hoop.