Dating, It's Complicated: Issue #14

I’ve been dating a girl for nearly 2 years now. However, early into our wonderful relationship there was a bit of a mishap. We’d been together for a month or so and hadn’t had sex (She was 14, and I was 16 at the time). My parents were leaving for a fancy Chinese dinner one night. Taking advantage of this golden opportunity I poured up some wine and decided we’d take a dip in the hot tub in my folk’s room. Everything went smoothly, even better than I could have imagined. We had gotten off with it and my parents even brought us home milkshakes afterwards… 5 minutes later there is a roaring noise coming from my parent’s room. Little did I know but the hot tub “jets” turn on 30 minutes after the tub empties to dry/remove any excess water. We were promptly busted by an infuriated, red-faced mother.
-Jared

A couple years ago when I was dating my ex, he told me he didn’t believe in medication and that I shouldn’t be on it. I’m bipolar. So when I went off it I had a total breakdown, and crying over the phone, I told him, “This is who I am. Do you still love me?” He was real quiet for a moment, then: “I think you should get back on your medication.”
-Anonymous

While talking with my girlfriend the other day I found out that she has never seen the movie Jurassic Park. Upon hearing this I immediately insisted we watch the movie that night, no exceptions. Time goes by and we watch the movie, all the while my girlfriend seems really concerned at the sight of the dinosaurs. I thought nothing of it until the movie ends and she turns to me with the most sincere face and says “That didn’t really happen did it? Dinosaurs aren’t real right?”……. I’m dating a moron.
-Dan

I had been in love with my best friend for four years, him feeling the same way all along. I was always reluctant to date him, because I didn’t want to risk losing our friendship. He was the only guy I had ever trusted and I cared about him more than anyone. I finally decided we should be dating, seeing as we loved and trusted each other: what could go wrong? After two weeks, he cheated on me with a girl he met on a bus.
-Jessica, CA

I was dating this girl online for about 6 months, earlier on she sent me some pics of her and I thought she was pretty cute. Then while I was on a forum that linked a lot of hot chicks, someone linked pictures of my girlfriend at the time. So I confront her and it turns out she was a scrawny kid in New Mexico who was gay. Yeah.
-Ryan

My girlfriend got mad at me because I was dancing with “some girl” while I was at a bar with some cousins. The “girl” was one of those cousins…
-Anonymous

About at week ago I had sex with an ex-boyfriend of mine. It was amazing sex, the kind of sex you tell all your friends about. After we fucked we went on to his porch for an after sex cigarette, you know, to get the taste of dick out of your mouth. Well then I say something about how this is my first time with a guy in months, because I’m bisexual and I have been going through a penis drought. Then he turns to me and says “Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’m gay.”
-Anonymous

My freshman year my roommate’s girlfriend would always text me saying that she wanted to hook up. I didn’t bother because I was in a relationship at the time. One weekend my roommate was out of town and I had just broken up with my girlfriend. While I’m out partying I get a text from my roommate’s girl, I finally give in and tell her to meet me at my room. After a night of wild sex we decide to go at it again the next morning. As I’m about to cum I hear my door being unlocked and my roommate walks in while his girl is riding me. This guy was a short but stocky wrestling type and he proceeded to beat me mercilessly while I’m wearing nothing but a condom. He was able to switch dorm rooms citing his reason as “Doesn’t respect my property”.
-Franky, Chico State

I was dating this girl in high school for about 4months now. She had a babysitting job and I would go over sometimes at night for a little late night romance while the kids were asleep, they were 2 and 4 so they went to bed early. Well, we got really hot and heavy and started to get into the dirty if you know what I mean, so she then tells me to make love to her over the coffee table. These people we’re rich mind you, and that coffee table looked pricey, but when in the mood, what the hell. So I proceed to make love to her over the coffee table when we hear a noise from upstairs. This scares me and I fall forward. Pushing my girlfriend and me through the glass coffee table, shattering it to pieces. Turns out one of the kids was awake because he heard his parents pull up in the driveway…they came in 2secs after the incident to see me and my girlfriend naked and a shattered coffee table. She lost her job…I lost my girlfriend…
-Josh, Windsor Ontario