3/4/09, 10:12 AM
Woke up covered in vomit with a snoring frat boy sleeping on me. Every day I wait for the house to get set on fire so that my miserable existence can end. My life consists of getting covered in vomit, acting as a makeshift bed for some horny teenagers or having some drunk guy pass out on me. I hate my life.
5/4/09, 1:42 PM
Last night I ended up being thrown through the front room window. The frat boys decided to create a slingshot out of bungee cord and a t-shirt and started friing things through the window. Then someone arrived with extra cords and started firing larger things namely me. I still have shards of glass under my cushions. I wish I was dead. Maybe soon I will be
6/4/09, 5:32 PM
theres going to be a party tonight. They've started to get the kegs and 6 packs ready. I hate parties. They end in me getting hurt or covered in some sticky substance. I still havent had the glass shards cleaned off of me meaning someone will probably get cut tonight meaning I'll end up covered in blood. I know that Im starting to get dirty and stink but theres nothing I can do to about it. Soon I'll end up in a dump like many others before me. I hate this so much.
9/4/09, 2:13 PM
Its 2:14 PM and theres a frat boy passed out on me. No one has woken him yet. I think they're all still asleep. I cant do anything for myself everythings done for me because I cant move. When will I bre released from this horrible life of torture?
16/4/09 7:27 PM
THIS IS IT!! THE FRAT BOYS HAVE SET ME ON FIRE!!! SWEET RELIEF HERE I COME!!!!!
17/4/09 12:52 PM
One of them threw a bucket of water over me. My worst fear is coming true and now I am being banished to the land known as "The Dump" as many have before me. I hoped to escape this life that I was forced into but unfortunately I was not strong enough and now as I am loaded into the back of a truck and driven to my final resting place I can only hope that someday some other couch will escape the same fate as me.This is my final entry