Frodo and Gandalf Go To The Grey Havens

Frodo and Gandalf is standing on the deck of the boat

Frodo: I’M ON A BOAT!

Gandalf: Yes, building ships is just one of the many fine skills possessed by the elves, but you better start packing we should be arriving any minute.

Frodo: Oh? I didn’t know you needed to pack to go to the Grey Havens.

Gandalf: Why not?

Frodo: Well, seeing as we are about to die, I think it is pretty pointless, dont you?

Gandalf: Die? What are you talking about? We are going to the Grey Havens Resort.

Frodo: We are not going to die? But I’m in a lot of pain here, you know, from bearing the ring so far, and becoming so attached to it. I need to die, to be able to move on. I thought the Grey Havens were just an elvish codeword for the afterlife.

Gandalf: Well, I’m sorry to ruin your death like this, but the Grey Havens Resort will just have to do. No one is going to die just yet.

One week later. Gandalf and Frodo are sunbathing together on the beach of the Grey Haven Resort.

Frodo: I was pretty set on the whole dying thing when we sailed out, but I must say that this Grey Havens Resort is pretty good. I’m not even thinking about the ring anymore, or the terrible terrible terrible pain it brought me. I can taste stuff again, and remember the feeling of the wind against my skin… and their alcohol is AWESOME! Am I right?

They high-five.

Gandalf: Yea, this is is probably the closest you get to heaven. Too bad we have to go back tomorrow

Frodo: What? We have to go back again?

Gandalf: Oh yes, this is a very popular place. Impossible to reserve it for more than a week at a time.

Frodo: But I gave such a tearful goodbye to the guys, because we all thought we would never see eachother again. What are they going to think when I show up after a week?

Gandalf: Oh, that was why the goodbye was so long. I just thought something was going on between you and Sam.